Blood Clot

Mom’s vitals are perfect, and her lungs sound great. The echocardiogram they did Saturday also came out perfect. They’re going to keep her on blood thinners, and as long as she’s on them, the clot will keep dissolving and hopefully she won’t have any more. They’ll probably want to keep her on blood thinners for quite a while since the cancer could possibly cause more clots, and we do NOT like clots.

Liver Biopsy

They were ready to send her home yesterday morning, but they decided to keep her for one more night so they could order a biopsy of the mass in her liver. It’s easier to order that as an inpatient procedure since inpatient procedures take precedent over outpatient procedures. The biopsy will be done sometime today. This means results will hopefully come quickly! We’re anxious to finally know exactly what we’re dealing with. We have an appointment with Dr. Juvvadi on Tuesday to discuss the results, if they’re ready in time. Hopefully mom’s body can chill out so this appointment won’t be cut short by another ridiculous emergency. 🙂 Biopsy results could possibly take up to 48 hours to get back, but hopefully it will be quick.

Bone Scan

The only other test we haven’t done that is necessary for staging is the bone scan. If you remember, that had to be rescheduled to today because of the barium sulfate mess on Friday. Because of the liver biopsy, we now have to move that appointment again. I’m going to reschedule it, and I’m hoping they can do Tuesday morning. I’m crossing my fingers. I think mom’s ready to not be tested anymore and to get on with treatment.

MediPort Surgery

If you remember random details or are stalking my mom, you may remember that the mediport surgery is currently scheduled for Wednesday morning. If you’re thinking surgery + blood thinners = uh oh, you’d be right. Dr. Juvvadi will talk with Dr. Clifford (surgeon) today to discuss what to do about this. The good news is mom doesn’t need the port for chemotherapy. They can do that through a PICC line, which is a tube that goes into her arm (like an IV) and up into her chest. The only problem with that is that the tube would hang out of Mom’s arm for a couple of months which doesn’t sound too glamorous. They still may decide to hold off the blood thinners for a couple days and do the port surgery later this week or next week. It depends on what the doctors think is best.

Pretending

Today we pretended like mom wasn’t in the hospital anymore. She showered for the first time in days (thank goodness), put on makeup, curled her hair, ditched the IV, and wore her regular clothes instead of the hospital gown. She looked pretty fabulous. We went down into a lobby with a couch and a big screen TV, ordered wings and pizza, and watched football with Sadie and Jason. It was nice for her to finally be able to get out of her tiny room and move around a little. Mom’s parents and one of her friends stopped by to visit, also helping to lift her spirits. She’s feeling pretty loved!

And thank you to everyone who I know wanted to come visit during mom’s short stay in the hospital. She kept visitors to a minimum since her “hotel room” (she keeps calling it that on accident) is the size of a shoe box. It gets a little crazy in here when multiple people try and squeeze in. I promise you’ll be able to see her soon! 🙂 I’ll keep you informed.

That’s all for the update on mom! I would like to write some things that would be helpful for me to get out, regardless if you read it or not. Feel free to skip this part. 🙂

My Thoughts

Last night I went to pick up dinner for me and my mom. She specifically requested soup, so I went to Panera and got her the soup she wanted. As I was getting out of the car in the hospital parking lot, the bottom of the paper bag full of food split open and everything fell out onto the pavement. Mom’s soup was the main casualty, dumping out every last drop as it fell to the ground. The worst part of this was that I didn’t even drop the food, and I usually drop everything. It just broke open. I immediately burst into a violent sob and said, “Everything is so hard. Why does this have to be hard too?” I sat there on the ground in the parking lot crying for a few minutes. The thing is, I was not even upset about the food. Mom wasn’t even that hungry and the cookies were safe in a separate bag, so what even was there to really be upset about? (Our priorities are clearly on point – cookies first. Always.) So there I sat next to my car in the parking lot in a full-fledged ugly cry, but it wasn’t about the soup.

I wanted to share that with you not at all because I want you to feel sorry for me, but to preface this: When we are at our lowest, and we are desperately seeking solace, and we lose our cool in a parking lot for a few minutes (oh wait – that’s just me), we are not alone. We have a Savior who knows our trials and our afflictions. He’s experienced all of our sorrows. I know that the Lord knows our pain. He knows exactly, and I mean exactly, what terrifying and exhausting emotions we are experiencing.

Last night as I was kneeling, I changed my prayer. I began praying for my mom to get better, and then I tried something new. I told God that I trust Him. I told Him that I know He knows the desire of my heart, and He knows that I desperately want Him to heal my mom. I told Him that I know He has the power to heal her, I trust whatever His will may be, and I have faith in Him no matter what. As I did this, I felt peace slow my heart and steady my breath. I felt comforted. I was still, and I knew that He is God.

Please continue praying with us! We feel so encouraged and loved by all of you.

Love y’all,

Sydnie